Friday, 13 March 2015

Writing Breakout

I decided that I needed to work on ideas in my writing and attended the breakout, here is a paragraph from my writing to prove I  have progressed in my ideas:

Daisy is gorgeous, her fur is velvety and soft  she is a small Jack-Russel terrier  and her fur smells of a sweet aroma reminding me of strawberries. I figured that Via hadn't come with us because she was busy looking after Daisy at home.(Dad had snuck out last night and went to the pet store.) How I love going to the doctors!  

After the breakout edited my writing (highlighted bits) and tried to add more detail E.G see(what you see) hear (what you hear) smell(what you smell) feel (E.G soft, rough, hard) and taste. 

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